Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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