yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
