; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
