Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
It's never too late to be topless.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
