In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
We had sex on a dog bed..
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I deserve this hangover.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
