I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
