Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
