We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Just took my morning after pill in the library
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
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