Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
