currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
