How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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