He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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