just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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