Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
