I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
