i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
