and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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