Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Your dad touched me again.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
