dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize