Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
