Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
