just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
