I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Someone signed my nipple.
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