just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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