As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I have fence marks all over my body
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
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