We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize