# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
