ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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