He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize