Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
