Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
