I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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