Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
