i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
