i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
