yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
