So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
