Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
