I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Drunk is a universal language darling
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
