I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
