i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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