once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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