The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
All I want is dick and wine.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
