If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
