I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
