woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
