your room smells of hookers.
And success
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
