from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
