wake up i wanna do it froggy style
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Michael Bay diarrhea
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
