If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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